I mean, I know Santa is not real, but as a kid, I liked having the sense of excitement and surprise knowing Christmas Eve was rapidly approaching. Then I quickly remembered how Santa never brought me what I wanted, and I would get so sad every year. Part of the reason was because I wouldn’t tell anyone what I wanted. I kept my deepest desires all to myself, testing Santa’s powers. He somehow never got it right.
Later in life I realized the burden Santa put on my mother. As a low income-single-parent, she would really go through the emotional roller coaster every year. Even now she gets anxious during the holidays. Right around Thanksgiving she starts in on her apologies for not having much to give us this year. It seems no matter how many times I tell her we don’t expect anything she still carries a residue of guilt.
Once I got comfortable with the idea that we weren’t introducing Santa Claus to the kids, because my husband simply refused to allow some mythical character take credit for his hard work in providing for his children – from then on our Christmases were a breeze. I don’t put up a tree, the decorations are too costly. In our current economy and one income household, I rather eat then look at Christmas lights.
However, I do buy gifts for our children. We have created our tradition from the teachings of Christ. Our kids are learning that God gave us the most precious gift, his only begotten son so that we might be saved. So every year on the day we observe Jesus’ birth, we give presents to the gifts that God has given us – our kids (and each other). Ariana embraces this tradition whole heartedly. Yet, for a brief time, we went through the, “even though Santa isn’t real, it’s O.K. to pretend, right mommy” phase. However that was quickly over once she realized she was still getting presents.
Every year, we begin our seasonal preparation the day after Thanksgiving. That is the day Ariana and I engage in negotiations over what presents she and her brother should receive for Christmas. The best part of having NO SANTA, is Ariana’s Christmas list. On average she will request three things. She thinks about it long and hard. Then generally she opens our negotiations with, “If you have enough money” or “If it’s not too expensive”.
Now that she is in the second grade and counting money, she will ask how much an item cost. Then she will determine if it cost too much money. Sometimes, if she really wants it, she will remove other things from her list. This exercise has turned into a budgeting 101 lesson. Is it sad that my daughter has already surpassed me in that area?
This year it is particularly difficult to purchase gifts for my kids. A dollar simply doesn’t stretch as far as it use to. For the barely middle class, help is limited or nearly non-existent. I have family and friends who qualify for programs that give to the very poor. When I was growing up, I lived below the poverty line. While supplemental programs serve a useful purpose, I thank God every day I am not so very poor that I qualify for them. I am also thankful that help is available for those families that really need it.
We, on the other hand, don’t need much. My kids have good health, both parents at home, a roof over their head and food on the table. They may not get everything they want, but they certainly get what they need. So when I had to sit the kids down and inform them that they may be lucky if mom and dad can get them one of the three things on their list, they took the news well. We opted to make cookies and other baked goods for our family and friends this year, as well.
I have to say that not believing in Santa Claus is the one thing that has saved all of our spirits this holiday season. Can you imagine how DEVASTING our kids would be if they thought Santa, with Christmas magic, would fill their wish list? I prefer it this way, they are learning early in life that all things have a season, this is ours to enjoy and love one another, being grateful and glad for the true blessings we have – EACH OTHER.
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